"Whatever Thing"

(by Enter the Worship Circle) Whatever Thing - First Circle

I'm not one of those moms who can't wait for school to start because the kids are driving me crazy. I enjoy having my kids at home with me. I'm realizing how fast my babies are growing up, so I'd rather not rush through any season! And let's face it: I don't like to see 6:10 (or anything prior to 7:00) on my alarm clock!

But I'll be honest and say that I'm looking forward to school starting for two reasons: 1) Routine & 2) Alone time with God.

I'm a routine person. I like patterns. I like to plan. And I don't adjust well to change. Numerous times throughout my life, people have told me that they've noticed I do the same thing at about the same time each day, eat the same thing at the same, etc. Knowing this about myself, I've tried to make a conscious effort to mix things up a bit. But it's difficult. I'm good at eating something different for dinner each day, but I find it hard to vary my routine when it comes to breakfast, lunch & snacks. When I ride my bike, I've been trying not go the exact same route each time. {Though this has been harder lately because I am now trying to avoid a certain creepy old neighbor guy ~ so I can't ride by his house coming or going!} Switching up my routine is hard for me because I feel like I'm fighting with myself & my natural tendencies. I naturally want to do things in the same order every day. All that's to say that summer messes with my routine. I stay up later, so I sleep later (on mornings that I don't have something planned too early). I end up feeling like I'm playing catch-up all day, but I never seem to accomplish everything that I need to get done. Things just feel chaotic when I don't have a routine.

And one major part of my routine that I lack during the summer is my alone time with God. I've mentioned this before, and I've tried to find ways to still have it. But it's easier said than done. I really had high hopes for this summer, but it hasn't happened. I can find time to read my Bible, but it's hard to actually spend time with God. This has been the hottest summer on record, so it has been nearly impossible to enjoy alone time on my back patio. I've tried to get up a little earlier than the kids, but my boy is an early bird. And I've sat alone in my closet a time or two, but somebody who didn't need me at all in the two hours prior to that will suddenly need me for something. By this point of the summer, I am longing to have some uninhibited, deep conversations with my God. I am a screwed up human being, and I desperately need Him in order to stay sane. On my own, I am weak. My thoughts are wayward, and I fail miserably. I lack peace and contentment, and I feel like I'm running on empty.

So needless to say, I'm looking forward to getting back in to the routine of things! And then I'll have about nine months to figure out a feasible routine for next summer...



Brooke said…
the important part is that you're craving this time with Him!
I am a routine person too Amy. :) On my own, I am weak.... so, so true. I hope you get to fill up that running on empty feeling soon! ♥
Amanda said…
I love how completely open and honest you are in this post.

Thank you so much for sharing. You are an encouragement to me. I too, find it so difficult to remove myself and just be with God. And unfortunately, I do not take the opportunities that do come about, to be with Him. Instead, I am lazy, and sleep, or veg in front of the t.v.

I need to be more disciplined. You encourage me to be better about this. And you also shine a light on my absolute need of Him.

P.S. : I could have written this post in regards to loving routines and schedules.

P.P.S. : AND you made me laugh out loud about having to avoid a creepy neighbor guy on your bike rides!!!

Zion said…
At first I read the sentence without the "not" and I thought it was strange because you certainly don't seem like one of those people who are anxious to get their kids out of the house. It all made sense when I read it again. I understand. I may not have the best routine, but what I do have I don't like have disrupted.

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